People left speechless by German version of a ‘full English breakfast’

British food gets a bad rap, but there are a few things we absolutely nail.

One: portable food. If you’ve ever been abroad and seeking a quick, easy lunch only to find the humble meal deal is more or less exclusive to the British Isles, you’ll know what we mean.

Packaged sandwiches, Cornish pasties, and Dairylea Lunchables might not stack up to the culinary arts of the French or Italians, but nobody can match us for quick and simple sustenance.

Nobody does it better than us (SimpleImages/Getty Images)

Other major areas where we excel are tea – of the beverage plus cake variety – and breakfast.

The Full English, along with fish and chips and beans on toast, is one of our premier contributions to world cuisine. A plateful of nutritious and delicious grub that is about as close to the fabled ‘breakfast of champions’ as any nation has ever achieved.

With that in mind, and given Britain’s limited appeal on the global grub market, it’s only natural that we get defensive at the idea of other nations devising their own variants.

But, frankly, we need to wind our necks in. Ask any Italian what they think of a British bolognese and you’ll get the education you need.

That brings us to the meat of the matter; the German Full English. If you’re of the sort to be upset by the English national team being managed by the German genius of Thomas Tuchel, look away now.

A Brit visiting Germany shared the discovery of a German Full English on Reddit, along with some startling inclusions that have drawn some British umbrage online.

There were sausages, bacon, mushrooms, fried eggs, baked beans, and toast – all delightfully English so far, old boy – but that’s where the normality came to an end.

For one, the Redditor claimed the sausages were spicy, which doesn’t sound all that unappealing. A little bit of spiciness in a Full English sounds like a fun spin on the classic.

The more confusing element shared in the Reddit post was this: a fruity dessert was included as a side dish.

"In Berlin they served me a full English with spicy sausages, a fruit bowl with every fruit bar tomatoes and looked at me in shock when I asked for condiments,” said the Redditor.

The German Full English (RihanCastel/Reddit)

"Weirdest experience I've had for a while. Fry ups aren't very common here by the way."

Some commenters felt the side fruit salad was a counterbalance to the greasy, carby, processed-y staples of the Full English: "Like they pity the English heart and go 'please have the fruit'."

"I kind of like the idea of a fruit salad as a kind of dessert after eating a fry up,” said another with an open mind. “Having it on the same plate is weird though."

Another added: "This is preferable to a Full English to this Brit - some fruit to balance all that grease. A full English is just too much these days."

Where’s the vitriol? Where’s the indignation? Is this the internet or not?