We’ve all been there on a Friday night: elbowing our way onto the bar after a ten-minute wait, trying to get a bartender’s attention between customers whilst also looking non-chalant, and then the bloke next to you orders four cocktails, a tray of Jagerbombs and more.
At that point you might as well get a book out and settle in for a few chapters, because you aren’t getting served for a while yet.
It isn’t just the thirsty punters who find this situation frustrating, of course. The bartenders are probably finding it far more unpleasant than you are.
When it’s a busy night, there are plenty of orders that bartenders dread.
Speaking to Business Insider, a set of expert mixologists from the US laid out the ten drinks that will slow things down even further on a really busy night.
(Generally speaking, the more complex the drink, the more you're likely to wait).
So here is the list of drink that could see you wait longer to get that drink in your hand:
Long Island Iced Tea
A delicious but hangover-inducing cocktail, the Long Island Iced Tea is a great way to start a night even if you know you’re sacrificing the next morning.
Vodka, tequila, light rum, triple sec, gin and a splash of coke make for a refreshing and peppy cocktail that’s sure to lift your spirits.
Sadly, for the bartenders the hangover starts immediately.
Jamie Robinson, a former bartender and assistant food and beverage manager at Outrigger Reef Waikiki Beach Resort, said the Long Island is a “big no-no, especially at a busy bar”.
There are simply too many ingredients involved, making it a fiddle to make one even when there isn’t the pressure of a bar groaning under all the thirsty elbows.
"You're likely only going to order one or two unless you plan on ending up on the floor at some point during the evening," she added, noting the potency of this tipple too.
Mojito
This traditional Cuban cocktail is a bona fide classic, and its popularity causes all kinds of headaches for bartenders.
White rum, sugar, lime juice, soda water and mint make for a punchy and refreshing beverage, there’s no doubt about it.
They’re particularly good in the summer, or perhaps in a hot bar that’s full to the rafters with sweaty boozers.
The trouble is that they take a while to make, slowing the whole show down.
Robinson said: "A proper mojito should feature hand-muddled limes and mint, plus whatever flavour you might be adding to it. They are a labour of love, to say the least."
White Russian
Another classic, the White Russian is composed of vodka, coffee liqueur, cream and ice, all served in a dense, old-fashioned glass.
The problem here is the cream, with Robinson noting that heavy cream is rarely left lying around and, frankly, you wouldn’t want to drink it if it was.
"Save your bartender the time of having to go check to see if they have some in the back, and save your stomach from mixing dairy with whatever else you might be inclined to drink that night."
Bloody Mary
If you love a bolognese then you can probably be swayed by a Bloody Mary.
A well-seasoned glass of boozy tomato juice goes down surprisingly well on a night out - it must be the vitamins!
While it’s not the toughest cocktail to make, there’s a risk factor here that means it should be avoided if you’re jostling for space.
After all, who wants to apologise to the poor person who got drenched in your Bloody Mary as you turned to head back to your table?
Bartender Meszasi said the ingredients themselves can also be tricky to find outside of brunch time, especially if it the Bloody Mary in question needs to be made in a rush.
Spicy Margherita
If you like a spicy kick but don’t fancy a Bloody Mary, there’s a less savoury option that will do the trick.
And by less savoury we don’t mean less delicious - we just mean it’s got less… tomato in it.
Spicy margaritas consist of tequila, orange liqueur, lime juice agave syrup, and some spice, whether it’s some chilli or a shot of a hot sauce to light things up.
They look great, they taste amazing, and they’re a nightmare for bartenders.
Executive bartender at Taste My Aruba, Zulay Duran, said this is another one to skip when the bar’s struggling to cope.
“This is a specialised drink that takes careful execution, which isn't feasible for most bartenders on a busy night," she said, recommending that punters pick a glass of wine instead.
Anything with Egg Whites
Let’s face it: if you’re in a hot, sweaty bar and you want something that contains egg whites, you want to get your head checked.
But if you can’t resist that gooey, eggy slime, maybe the knowledge that all the bartenders will hate you is enough to stem your cravings.
Head bartender at The Rum House, Nick Jackson, said the likes of an Amaretto Sour or a Gin Fizz are an absolute no-go if you want the bartenders to prioritise you the next time you get to the bar.
These drinks’ signature egg white foam is a real faff to make, after all.
Jackson said it’s “very labour intensive” and requires several minutes of prep.
If you order one and soon feel a sharp elbow in your side from a fellow bar-goer, you’d have to say it’s fair enough.
Pina Coladas
Something, something, caught in the rain, yes, very good, well done.
This tropical classic doesn’t just have an annoyingly-catchy song carrying it through time and space, but it’s also a pain in the neck for a mixologist who’s got ten pairs of eyes boring into the back of their head while they make one.
Zach Pace, a beverage expert at Ten Rooms, said: "Please don't make the bartender fire up a blender in the middle of a crazy service."
Save it for the sun loungers.
Coffee-based Cocktails
The likes of the espresso martini are caught in a funny spot: they’re delicious, but when is the right time to drink one?
Early in the morning? Probably not.
If you want to get a good night’s kip? Definitely not.
So surely all that’s left is late at night in a busy bar when you need a little kick to see you through to closing time? Well, yes, but not if you want to keep the bartenders on-side.
Irish coffees are another offender, and the main issue is that the coffee tends to linger in a cocktail shaker unless it’s cleaned thoroughly.
Vinny Spatafore, bartender and beverage operations manager at Blue Bridge Hospitality, explained: "The strong, lingering espresso smell means bartenders have to wash the shaker extra carefully, which can be time-consuming."
There’s also the headache of carefully placing some coffee beans on top of the drink, although perhaps the bartenders could just forgo that little flourish.
Layered Shots
If you’ve ever tried to make a Baby Guinness, you’ll know that a layered shot is easier said — and downed — than made.
Sunshine Foss, founder and CEO of Happy Cork, said that ordering a tray of these is sure to make a mixologist consider a career change.
Multiple spirits, precision pouring, and steady hands in a hectic environment all amount to a big ask, and that’s just to make one of the things.
"Bartenders are already under pressure to serve drinks quickly, ordering layered shots just doesn't make sense for anyone," said Foss.
Personalised Drinks
Even 007 might consider ordering something other than a Vesper Martini when it’s 10pm on a Friday night and his local Wetherspoons is bursting at the brickwork with boozy guests.
And that goes for you, too: keep the personalised cocktails to yourself when it’s busy out.
On most occasions, you’ll be left disappointed anyway. The bartender will, quite fairly, insist that you stick to the standard options when the pressure is on.
But if you really can’t help yourself, at least try to make the instructions as simple and straightforward as possible.
Joshua Lucas, a mixologist from Kiki's in California, simply said: "Be specific, but not a poet."
Featured Image Credit: Getty Stock ImagesTopics: US Food, UK Food, Restaurants and bars, Alcohol
Kerri-Ann Roper